Review: Katy Perry is a Marine?

So I haven’t posted anything in forever, but I’ll try to as I stumble upon anything interesting. Katy Perry’s “Part of Me” music video just came out three days ago. She first performed “Part of Me” during the 2012 Grammy’s. A lot of people believe that the song is about her falling out with Russell Brand but I’m pretty sure it was written a few years back and it was about her ex-boyfriend from Gym Class Heroes. The fact that she debuted the song after the divorce,however, does mean that her performance was directed at Russell.

When the trailer first came out, I was pretty sure it’d be a fail as it resembled 30 Seconds to Mars’ “This is War”, and the rhythmic marching of Lady Gaga’s “Alejandro”. After watching this video fifteen times and counting, I can say that it wasn’t as bad as I originally thought.

The video starts off with a younger version of Katy Perry gazing into a keepsake locket of her then beau with some freshly manicured ladynails in an old Volvo.

Girl, you done got your nails did!

Clad in some heavy makeup which fails to cover a cheek of acne, she looks up to what is revealed to be her man kissing another girl at his workplace. Stalker much, Katy? But then again, she probably had her suspicions in the first place so it’s not her fault.

All the Nars and NYX in the world can't hide the pizza face.

A jaw-grinding Katy hops out of her car and makes her way to Mr. Wrong with an expression that looks like she’s clearly trying to remember her lines with her head half-cocked at him. I expected a lot more confrontation but she places the locket down on a desk with not so much a clunk, swipes his face with a manila folder, and sashays away.

Katy drives doing her best to convey bottled-up anger via lip chewing. The track begins in the background and she pulls up to a gas station and grabs an Arizona. I have to say that Arizona makes some of the best beverages out there. She makes her way to the counter to pay and somehow she has to take off some sunglasses that weren’t on her in the first place. Is it me or is it just weird that she drove without sunglasses to protect her sizzling cataracts but puts them on in a gas station before taking them off to the almighty Arizona? What has the world come to these days?

So this is what fixes a break up.

Before she heads out, she finds a bulletin board that has a sticker reading, “All women are created equal, then some become Marines”. I must mention that at this point in the video, you get to see the outline of her wig, too.

And I had no idea she had a crooked tooth, but hey, I’m not perfect and she doesn’t have to be either. At least I make sure my faux is hidden though. Bad, Katy.

The idea of being a Marine smacks Katy right in the face and she rummages through her trunk to pull out her Adidas gym bag? Hmm, more advertisement. She locks herself in the gas station restroom with the mysterious gym bag. She arms herself with some kiddie scissors and hacks away at her wig. Good thing it was her wig, right? So I’m going to point out that in movies, books, and videos, it seems that when shit goes downhill for us girls, we chop our hair off. I don’t know if it’s a symbol of rebirth or what, but that was my excuse when I hacked my hair off. The fact that she’s doing it to be enlisted in the Marines, I wouldn’t say that it is accurate nor is it necessary. For a phoenix from the ashes kind of video, it’s disappointing that this music video still employs a lot of old school and outdated beliefs. The hair hacking is the first of a handful that follows in this vid.

Katy, what have you done?!?!
Katy, what have you done?!?! I can't help but feel this is what she looks like when she's drunk.

With her hair cropped, she binds her breasts … Okay, stop. Katy, this is not Mulan or some kind of ancient war that involves espionage and cross-dressing. Within seconds, this music video becomes more than outrageous. Did I mention, that she flashes her panties, too?

She hands over her personal belongings at the base in exchange for her new uniform. Every single person she bunks with has a bun … and she has short hair. Not thing wrong with short hair, but was that the only method they could think of to make her stand out other than her still wearing a few layers of foundation, concealer, lip gloss, and mascara? Tsk, tsk. We go through a few shots of her and her then boyfriend.

These aren't even her hands! :(

She carries a fellow Marine down a hill, does a few practice punches, walks down a beam, switches her watch to her left hand so we can get a clear glimpse of it, and bayonets a dummy.

Wrong hand ...

Katy gets snail mail from her ex, Jason, in all caps and decides to Zippo the hell out of it.

She dances and twirls underneath a flag of stripes and stars while we get numerous shots of amphibious landing training which is pretty inaccurate and her doing some happy lip-syncing.

And we finally end the video with her clad in camo face paint.

I have to say that there was a lot going on in this video and I realized that this is the second time I’ve reviewed one of her videos. Katy’s not my absolute favorite when compared to Gaga but I can’t even imagine doing an analysis of any Gaga-esque video because that would take a whole week to type.

Visually, this music video takes us into a world that not many of us know of unless we are in it, but is it just and accurate? I definitely cannot say so. I found the concept hard to believe when Katy’s basically walking around with bad acting and so much makeup to hide her insecurities. If she wanted to be strong, she didn’t have to cut her hair or bind her D cups. She should have taken a look at herself and wiped off the superficial layers. You don’t get passed a machine gun and you’re an empowered woman. Having self-confidence and a high self-esteem is what makes you, yourself, powerful. These are modern times and I wish this video could’ve taken us a step forward as opposed to pushing us a step back when it comes to propaganda and old beliefs.

I understand the symbolism behind the video, but this video left me quite unsatisfied. There were way too many unnecessary things going on and even though she wanted to represent the women of the Marine Corps in a good light, I can’t help but feel that the video flopped on real self-empowerment. The song and the video do not mesh at all, but hey, they tried.

I hope you’ve enjoyed the analysis and all I can say is until next time everyone! By the way, I hate that she never has a true 1080p music video. Yes, 1080 is offered but I refuse to be conned, Katy! Maybe she should take after Gaga and get her own RED camera.

Katy’s video is below and as always, enjoy in hd.

MTV Video Music Awards 2011: Katy Perry Going Hard on the Liquor, Lady GaGa’s New Boyfriend Within Her, MAC Fix+, and Alter Egos

photo courtesy of ibtimes.com - GaGa power!

So Gaga starts off the night as Joe, same guy from her “You and I” video that was released earlier this month. Am I the only one who’s noticing a trend of alter egos? Sasha Fierce to Beyonce, Lady GaGa to Joe and Ziggy Stardust from David Bowie. Maybe artists feel like after a while, they’re expected by the fans and the general public to act and be a certain way. So they create an alter ego so they can do something different or try something new. Think about it, if an artist wanted to go batshit insane in public, it would hurt their reputation. However, if they were their alter ego at the time the incidents happen, then the main reputation wouldn’t really be affected although in some cases it does.

More or less, the MTV VMAs seemed a bit uneventful last night. I’m pretty sure Lady GaGa or perhaps Joe fell off the piano as she was jumping off from the looks of peoples’ faces around her. I don’t want to seem like a bad person, but I was sitting there expecting her to trip or fall. It’s not that I’m a sadistic person or that she’s clumsy, but the fact that she gets so into her performances, into the zone, that she’s been known (and been recorded) to fall on her face a few times already. Last night was no exception. But hey, her performance along with Lil Wayne’s closing performance were pretty much the best of the night. As for GaGa, I really don’t know why they kept switching back to Katy Perry. What in the world does GaGa being a man have to do with the “California Girls” singer, Katy Perry? I mean, when Lady GaGa’s “Alejandro” came out, Perry tweeted some not so nice words, but I’m sure there isn’t anymore beef between the two ladies. Or is there?

photo courtesy of mtv.com ... kanye, not a happy man right now

Speaking of Katy Perry, she won two awards last night – Video of the Year for “Firework” and Best Collaboration for “E.T.” with Kanye West. So of course, anyone who goes up there will have to do their little speech on what and who got them to win the “Moon Man” award as Perry dubbed him. Katy supposedly drank too much beforehand because she pretty much pissed the hell out of Kanye who left stage immediately after their speeches as she brought up the Taylor Swift incident and the assumed that Kayne West was receiving his first “Moon Man”, thus calling him an amateur. Katy, you have to hold off on the liquor next time or else no one will collaborate with you. Her coming from a religious background, I’d expect her to thank God a bit but perhaps next time. Honestly, I don’t know what to think of the girl. She used to be pretty alternative in her attitude and looks before she became a carbon copy pop princess. Lady GaGa pretty much did the opposite. She took the advice of the label to get her mainstream. Once she did, she found herself in a very powerful position in our music industry today so that she’s able to show her true colors, sing whatever she wants, etc. Maybe Katy will catch up eventually.

photo courtesy of maccosmetics.com - Mac Fix+ for only $20

So, we go onto other issues such as things that have been going on in my life lately. All is well and I’ve been meaning to blog more but I’ve been super busy as a new mom. You know how it goes. If not, I was planning on writing a blog post on postpartum life anyway so look out for that soon!

I know you guys are going to hate on me for this, but I just discovered MAC Fix+. Well, I’ve heard about it before but up until this month have I just experienced the magical wonders of this make up finishing spray/skin refresher. I got it at Macy’s for $20 for the 3.4 fl. oz. bottle. MAC also has a travel size version but you have to either go to an actual MAC store or order it online because you won’t find it at the department stores (I asked!). This spray is used by many celebrities/ make up artists and it’s really something that you either know about or you don’t. This product sets your make up and keeps it on for the entire day. And if you’re looking a bit off, refresh by spritzing some on your face. What they tell you to do is spray your face after you apply your moisturizer and once again after you have all of your make up on. MAC Fix+ takes away that “made powdery look” and gives you a very natural finish as if you had no cosmetics on at all. And another thing is if your foundation tends to be a bit streaky, all you have to do is give your foundation brush a spray before you dab it into your foundation. It smells like MAC’s MoistureLush cream, very fresh and clean. The only bad thing about this product is that you can become easily addicted, but good thing it’s relatively affordable. So try it out because I know you’ll never live without it again.